Yoga For Stress Relief: Top 10 Excuses For Not Doing Yoga and Avoiding Stress Relief

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6/5/09 If you do yoga:  

1. You will look young and energetic instead of old and tired and will have to give up lecturing younger people on how much easier they have it than you did when you were their age.  

2. You will no longer freak out and lose your temper when the smallest things go wrong, and will be unable to avoid all those pesky people who didn't like you because of your temper and who now want to be your friends. 

3. You will lose the physical clumsiness, lack of co-ordination and inability to touch, or even see, your toes that you have been cultivating as status symbols of the aristocratic life of leisure and ease that you lead.  

4. You will mess up your shot at the gold medal in the upcoming "Couch Potato of the Year" international championship by becoming altogether too energetic.

5. Your doctor will get lonely because you don't visit as often and you have no idea what else you could do with the money you spend on various medications, or on gas going back and forth to your doctor's office.  

6. Your health insurance premiums might no longer be as high as possible because you are doing something that will reduce your chances of getting serious diseases.  

7. You will have to give-up your time-tested morning ritual of sucking-in, grimacing, pulling and tugging at the zipper of your pants to close over your spare time as you get dressed to greet another day.  

8. You might have to get rid of your prize winning collection of diet books if you started losing weight without trying to diet.  

9. You will have a way to recuperate from jet lag and other forms of exhaustion and will no longer able to complain to everyone for weeks about how utterly tired you are.  

10. If you reduce stress, have more energy, and enjoy really good health, you might lose the outstanding complaining skills you have spent years developing.  

So there you have it: a ready made list of excuses to use when someone asks you why you haven't tried yoga even though you are stressed out and would like some stress relief.

~ IN YOUR GARDEN ~ (Meditation)

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This is a guided meditation for the beginning of a circle, or just for a reprieve to ground yourself after a stressful day.

Sit comfortably, feet on the floor and hands resting gently on your lap. Take three deep and cleansing breathes and centre yourself.

Now with eyes closed, let your subconscious bring into your vision a gate! Let it come as it will and take gentle note of it, what it is made of, the height, width and structure.

Approach the gate and although you may see a lock on it, know that it will open for you. This is your own boundary, one you have put there; no-one else can get in except you. Now the gate will open and you will walk in to YOUR garden. Take a moment and turn around to look at the rest of your boundary, see what the gate is attached to, or not as the case may be. Just take gentle note, then turn around and face your garden.  Here there is perfect peace, here you can see all there is to see. Look around and take note. No-one else can come here and the only living beings will be animals, so if you see them take a note, and then explore where you are.

Please do not have any perceptions of what you will see, allow the higher guide (your sub-conscious) to show you what is you, a meadow, a lakeside, a beach or a mountain side, it depends on you.

Take a few minutes to look and relax, and when you are ready, sit down and breathe in the air. Just relax with yourself knowing that you cannot be disturbed, and when you are ready to come back look at your feet.

When you look at your feet, you will see a beam of white light touching them. On looking up at the beam you will see that it stretches in the far horizon and is without end. Watch as the beam gentle moves over you and completely encompasses you within its light. As the light enfolds you, you are surrounded by protection, by love and by the divine healing that is your right.

The light will transport you back to your chair, safely and with gentleness, and when you are ready, you will open your eyes and be back again. 

Footnote:

The garden represents you, the inner you. On reflection of what you have been shown, a great deal of where and why things are as they are should/could be made easier to understand. Please remember that you and only you are the only one allowed in the garden. If another being is there, even a guide, then there is a problem with your control. You are allowing others to control you and even when it is with love, it is truly in my opinion, not the best state of affairs.

Meditation channeled on the 7th January, `2008 by the group Lazarus.